Here are some ideas to makeit easier for your child to get bed:
Visual Schedule: Pictures and cues can help your child see what is included in each step of the routine, and help you both talk about the plan and keep a consistent bedtime routine (i.e.: first is bath time, second is brushing teeth, third is story time, fourth is turning the nightlight on, fifth is hugs and kisses, etc.)
Preparing for the Following Day: Help you child get ready for the next day by sharing activities like laying out her clothes, organizing her backpack, and making her lunch. Besides serving as activity-cues to prepare your child for bed, they help him learn responsibility and gain practice and confidence in performing real-life tasks. Finally, it will eliminate some of the “morning rush”, and lower stress at the beginning of the day.
Heavy Physical Exercise: Some children need to engage in heavy exercise to help tire their minds along with their bodies. Although ideally there are real-life tasks that can be given (helping an adult take out the garbage, helping bring in groceries (leave the cans in the car for the kid!), etc., it can even includes pre-planned exercises. Things like carrying something across the room (filled soda bottles, for instance), or pushing baskets of blocks or pulling a filled wagon . Also, “animal walks” (like crab walk, seal flopping, kangaroo hopping) and stretching routines. I found that outdoor play (in a safe environment) helped a lot as the start of our routine! Be sensitive! For some children this actually revs them up, and they will need a LONG time to “cool down”! For all children this should be the first part of the bedtime routine, so that your child can calm down during the other steps (toothbrushing, etc.)
For an older child, recording feelings and memories in a Journal/Notebook can be a very good pre-bed activity. Have a special notebook where your child or you can write down things that happen during the day. Some children relax by writing out worries or thoughts that are on their minds and may be hindering them from falling asleep. It can help with anxiety that sometimes happens. One parent created a to do list for her child in the note book so that the child could “forget” things she wanted to remember.
“Hot Dog” or “Sandwich”: Some children need more proprioceptive and tactile input. This helps them relax and creates more body awareness. Using large pillows and blankets (e.g. have the child lay on top of a large pillow or pile of pillows and cover her body with another pillow, providing “squishes” to add the sandwich ingredients; or roll your child snugly in a blanket like a hotdog, providing “squishes” to add the ketchup and mustard, etc).
Timer (visual cue): Set a timer that your child can see to show your child how much time she has before bed, or more specifically, how much time she has left to complete a certain bedtime activity such as reading a book. This will ideally help to eliminate the battle of “just one more book” or “just 5 more minutes”, because there is already a pre-determined amount of time set aside.
Weighted Blanket or Covering: Cover your child with a weighted blanket in order to provide her with extra tactile and proprioceptive (body awareness) input. A weighted blanket helps provide an evenly distributed weight and a calming effect.
It is really important to note that children who are over-tired are not going to handle any degree of choice well. (We adults don’t handle it all that well, either, right?) And they won’t understand why they are cranky, so it will be overwhelming for them. We need to be sensitive to this.
Bottom line is: CHILDREN NEED SLEEP: speak with your pediatrician about how much is right for your child, and don’t be surprised by what he recommends. Remember they are not adults: they need more sleep. (10-12 hours). Think of all the growing their body is doing.
I am happy to speak with you about creating your own bedtime routine, or problem solving any challenges that have come up. I can be reached at 058-644-6812 (my bedtime is around 10:00 on a good night!) Don’t hesitate to give me a call.
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